I wish i was in the wii world.
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
While in Europe, he bought me a pouring tap to put on my liquor so I don't spill. This means 2 things.1) He really loves me. 2) I'm a noticeable alcoholic.
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
In order of importance: Where am I? Where's my car? Where are my clothes? Who is this chick in the room?
Anne's couch, the bar, your car, Anne.
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
Randomize
