the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
If you want to borrow my flask for all future interviews as a good luck charm because your last one went so well with it in your suit pocket, just let me know
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
This was the first time I've ever pushed myself until I vomited. Sorry, random couple laying on a dock at 8:30am. I would have picked a better spot so you didn't have to watch/listen to me vomit, but you guys were being MAD quiet. I had no idea you were there.
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake đź‘Ś
His name isnt in my phone as “Satan’s spawn” for no reason. #devildick
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