dude i woke up laying next to some guy. i dont have my bra or his name. he has a nice tv though.
I just called a phone sex line and you know what I did? I sat there and cried
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
Turns out, his fucking is as lame and staggered as his NFL career.
Your 13 year old niece and her best friend half carried you from the beach to the pool where you then clung onto a raft and screamed about having pretty hair.
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
"can you come pick me up from the ikea parking garage i think i slept here"
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
Randomize
