Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
URGENT INPUT I'm at a renesance fair after party and I'm 100% lined up to fuck their sword swallower OR their contortionist. Dont say both - which direction doth I roll?
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
I can get weed and taco bell delivered but frozen peas and a loaf of bread are just too scarce, what the hell is wrong with people?
Randomize
