you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
Randomize
