You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
are you listening to the theme from Jurassic Park whilst pooping?
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
Randomize
