She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
The next time you try to involve a tickle me Elmo in my orgasm, I'm leaving you
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
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