so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
You tried feeding my python vodka through a funnel. Fuck off.
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
I've decided if you aren't here in fifteen minutes I'm leaving you for Mario the 75 year old Colombian bartender.
Randomize
