ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
He woke me up at 3 am kneeling on the floor pissing and yelling, then he passed out and stole my comforter. I want a new roommate...
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
I just farted a soft, gentle fart and it made me think of the eye puff glaucoma test at the eye dr. I hope that's not fart air they use for those. And yes, I'm texting you from the toilet and yes again, I'm high.
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
The CEO is puking on the sidewalk and the HR director just offered me coke. Engineers have the best parties
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
Randomize
