You really coming over, don't trick.
Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
When did we convert life to cartoon?
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
Now: to brush my teeth, put on my grandma slippers and earplugs, masturbate to 50 Shades and then PTFO
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
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