I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
This girl is more easily done than said...
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
Randomize
