Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.
When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
You just got cockblocked by Conan O'Brien.
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
Randomize
