every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
I need a hoe opinion
go on
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
I’m inviting a few of my favorite manwhores to a pool party. Bring booze and wear your banana hammock so Amy can see what I’m always talking about
Randomize
