Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
I was trying to be good but he showed up with dinner and wine and I exploded. Like a bomb. A dirty, sexy bomb
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