worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
Got blown by one of the bridesmaids. Family BBQ today. They all know. Talk about awkward.
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
I just realized that with the new snapchat update / emoji sticker thing I can now use easily use emojis to cover my boobs in nudes.
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
I didn't even know we were hiding from the cops, I was just playing with the cats. People kept telling me to be quiet the cops are here and I was like DID YOU SEE THIS CAT!?
I can’t believe you’re letting her use the Mercedes
It seemed like a better idea while she was giving me a hand job. It’s a good thing we weren’t having sex. Who knows what I would agree to during sex
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