A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
I actually feel bad for him. He has me as a girlfriend and he's like a saintly cleanly person... And I'm over here telling him to jizz on my back and shit.
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
Randomize
