soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
it's not cheating when I paid for it
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
I’ve seen not one, but three Facebook articles on my feed today about “how to eat ass”. Idk what the universe is trying to tell me but it’s needs to chill
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
Randomize
