Turns out you can't chew it over with twix in real life
Dude I've never seen anyone get slapped that hard
The prostitute across the street from us is having a seizure on her front lawn again.
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
I'm gonna need you to NOT let me play duck duck goose with three racoons in the middle of the street next time.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
Randomize
