I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
For some reason 'start yourself on fire drunk' isn't nearly as funny after last 4th of july..
I'm drinkin whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
It's rum buckets o'clock
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
Randomize
