All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
I was out with the drag queens until 7am. This is the hangover I needed to kick my ass back to sobriety. Dear Virgin Mary, fuck my life.
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
One of my students submitted a thesis proposal to find the exact correlation between desire for sexual intercourse and vaginal heat.
Tell me you accepted it! This is critical fucking research!
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
I didn't have cash to pay cover at the bar, so I traded the bouncer a Krispy Kreme doughnut i had in my purse
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
Randomize
