I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
I opened a jar of Ragu so I could use it as a cup. You tell me how it's going.
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
I am making dinner in lingerie and heels and there is a 75% chance his roommate is going to walk in on this.
Yup. There he is. This conversation is awkward.
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
Randomize
