if i die, you can have my worn out liver and american apparel deep v's.sell the liver to a chinese restaurant
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
For Valentine's Day I've purchased six lighters and I'm decorating them for him. I'm on a full ride to an art school and this is what I'm using my talents for. An intervention is needed. Please stop letting me date stoners.
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
Randomize
