Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
If you want to borrow my flask for all future interviews as a good luck charm because your last one went so well with it in your suit pocket, just let me know
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
Randomize
