Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
I want to leave work and go home and eat Five Guys and masturbate
Hi. I probably already told you this mid puke, but thanks again for babysitting me last night. How did I get in the car?
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
Was it high me or sober me who put those Jolly Rancher sticks in the freezer? I'd be soooo impressed if it was high me.
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
I'm going to start referring to my liver is Livy. I feel like if I give it an affectionate nickname it will hate me less. Livy isn't ready for syllabus week.
I think we all know your liver needs a man's name.
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
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