Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
This morning my doorman told me it was an accomplishment for me to be standing and conscious after last night.
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
A few things for you to consider: 1. Drunk enough that I'm looking up the dictionary definition of Wish. 2. Dictionary.com has new features. 3. Windows is offering me 500 business cards for 5 bucks. 4. I've always wanted a card that says I'm a ninja
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
I swear the pregnant cashier was jealous when I bought my plan B
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
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