Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
wait do you know what youre gonna say if they ask how youre getting back?
yes. helicopter.
When you get home there will be live fish in the bathtub. I did not put live fish in the bathtub.
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
Dude. Photoshop a Santa hat on your mug shot and send it as your Christmas cards.
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
Randomize
