party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
The paper boy just woke me up in the front yard again.
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
Randomize
