last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
'valentine' just autocorrected to 'cake robe' in my phone
I think that summarizes my life up pretty accurately
I supernannyed him into submission
Ugh I realized he only responds to my snaps when I’m eating a popsicle
Why are male brains so small?
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
Randomize
