Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
I think the only context in which I'd be comfortable being kidnapped is by a band of baby sloths
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
Randomize
