So the last day on the vacation I woke up in the bath tub. My mom said she asked me during the night what I was doing and I said, "swimming."
burritoes are like sleeping bags for ground beef
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
Yeah I was just reminiscing about that time a seagull shit on your head at the beach
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
Randomize
