i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
The Mets? Come back? That'd be like Nickelback writing a good song.
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
Wingman of the year award. I made out with her gay roommate in order for you to get laid. Better have been good.
The gay roommate was probably better than her. Consider yourself lucky.
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
Randomize
