Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
Bruce the cab driver wants to take me on a date to see Taken 2
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
Randomize
