corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
I'm at work, and just realized I the beer smell I keep getting random whiffs of is my bra. I fail at life.
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
Do you think we could brew coffee with beer? I'm thinking a hazelnut Guinnesspresso can only end with pure awesome.
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
He said I have the “Denzel Washington” of vaginas.
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
Randomize
