it's like her boobs came off with her bra
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
I've been smelling a baby wipe for three minutes. I didn't think I was that drunk but I guess I am
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
You need Xanax blowdarts
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize
