I feel like your standards for women is like rent-a-centers standards for credit.
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
I'm too high and old for this...
Randomize
