Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
i just used a urinal to avoid climbing stairs, i need to quit drinking.
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
In other news, I just burned my penis
Would you be so kind as to inform your husband that my truck is forever cursed by mashed potatoes and it's his fault.
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
Randomize
