Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
Randomize
