Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
Your roommate was biting my friend last night. It was weird.
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
He stood me up and then his cat died. I feel like this is Gods way of saying he's on my side, even after the tequila fiasco.
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
Randomize