At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
'valentine' just autocorrected to 'cake robe' in my phone
I think that summarizes my life up pretty accurately
i texted "amiibo vore" to my insurance agent instead of someone else. do you think they'll raise my rates out of disgust?
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
I'm armed with nothing but $4 lip gloss gum and my phone. Ready to take on the fucking world.
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
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