Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
She just tried to talk over a fart. The fart was way longer than the sentence she originally wanted to say so she just added gibberish to the end. Gross
Literally the only reason we didnt get arrested was because the cop said I reminded him of Steve Stifler from American Pie
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
I just sent an "I'm sorry I forged a prescription in your name" email. It was one of the more awkward things I've done this week.
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
Randomize