We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
It feels like I shit a light bulb that shattered on the way out.
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
I'm going to die alone in a sea of empty vodka bottles and cats.
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
Randomize
