Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
Note to self: the judgement that occurs when unrolling your last 5 which was used to snort drugs the night before, to pay for alcohol before noon on a Monday is worth just sucking it up and taking an overdraft fee.
Wait a min, you had drugs last night?!
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
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