Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
Date with Air Force guy was nice btw. And for my next trick I'll talk him into fucking me in his fighter jet at 30,000 ft.
I realized today that the only things I'm guaranteed to have with me at all times are lipgloss, condoms and a USB drive. hmmm...
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
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