I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
woke up next to the new dishwasher. set the record for banging a new employee to 6 hours...i should be a professional sexual predator
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
Randomize