Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
The air was thick with penises
Well, when you bump into your parents at a swingers meetup, it's time to change cities
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
That moment that random you banged behind the bar is going to be your son's third grade teacher... yup I'm there.
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Randomize
