Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
Dude, why did I wake up with ketchup packets in my bed and the stove in my room??
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
Why is there a wet sock in my garbage? Why did I chug so much red wine? Why was someone signing into my iCloud account at 4 am in China? Why do I do self-destructive reckless things? So many questions.
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
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