oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
he stopped making out with me and said "can I make you grilled cheese? I feel like I owe YOU something"
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
Randomize
