oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
as your best friend, I hope we never outgrow 'I Just Got Laid' texts
My farts smell like burning tires and false courage
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
Randomize
