South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
While strippers were eating ones out of my boobs, several sources claimed trump shared classified info with the russians. We should get hammered on Mondays more often, bitch.
He literally asked permission to hit on me
Randomize
