SEEEEXXX PLEASE
the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
Is it weird that I shop for lingerie by thinking if it will look good on both me and your floor?
No. Not at all.
Randomize
