Excuse me? I'm weird? You're the one sticking your penis into a pringles can.
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
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